Farm Bureau’s golden couples offer insights on life, love and family

Commitment, passion, values and faith—these are the core components of a strong relationship. A farming life is not always an easy one, but these two Farm Bureau couples say it’s the experiences they’ve had and the lessons they’ve learned on the farm that has fostered a healthy, happy marriage and raise a family with strong values. A marriage lasting 50 years or more is no small accomplishment in today’s world, and these two couples reflect on their time together and what’s helped their marriage stand the test of time.

Max and Avolene Boyles
Stokes County Farm Bureau members Max and Avolene Boyles met through the Methodist Youth Foundation when Avolene was just 14 years old and Max was 18. Their relationship persevered for four years, and in 1951 the pair got married—58 years, two children, four grandchildren and two great-grandchildren later, they’re still going strong.

Max and Avolene have farmed together since they got married, and Avolene can’t remember Max wanting to do anything other than farm. “His mother told me that at 15 he saw a tractor in the field and said, ‘That’s what I want,’” Avolene says. And that’s exactly what he got.

“I started farming while I was in school, and when I graduated I got into chickens,” Max says. “We raised chickens until 1967, and then we just had tobacco. Me and my brother farmed together until 1978 when he left farming to carry mail.” Throughout his farming career, Avolene has been by his side.

“We worked together in the chicken business and with tobacco it was the same way,” Max says. “When you’re farming you have to get up very early, and she would get up to fix breakfast and be ready to go into the field by daylight. We just did everything together.”

The way they’ve approached their business together is similar to the way they have approached their marriage.
“We reason with each other and we make decisions,” Avolene says. “We’ve never really had a fuss. If something wasn’t OK, we just let it go. We might discuss it, but we’re not going to have a knock-down, drag-out about it.”

“When we tell people that we really can’t remember an argument they always say, ‘Well then there’s something wrong with you,’ but that’s just the way we are,” Max says.

Avolene credits their happy memories to their stable family life. “We’ve been blessed,” she says. “Everything with raising our children went well. We really didn’t have the problems some people have to contend with.”

“We always take life one day at a time,” Max says. “We also had the support of our neighbors and family. This was a really tight-knit community, and if you were in need there was always someone here to help out.”

Now that the Boyleses have raised their family, they are giving back to their community and family in the same way they received support when they were first starting out.

In addition to his 30 years as a county director with Farm Bureau, Max is also a member of the Ruritan Club and active in politics and the church where he and Avolene first met. Avolene spends most of her time doing volunteer work in the community and taking care of her great-grandchildren. Together, Max and Avolene still have a large garden where they grow enough produce to give it away to the community for free.

“We’re just thankful we can get around and are still able to do all of this,” Avolene says. “As long as he can still plow, we’ll still do it.”

Bob and Agnes Shipley
Watauga County Farm Bureau members Bob and Agnes Shipley are a spritely pair, especially when you consider their ages. Bob is 96 and Agnes is 91, and they’ve been married since 1942. But life never slows down for them.

In their 67 years of marriage they’ve traveled the world together, including a trip to Ireland they have planned for this spring. “We figure we’ll keep going as long as we’re able to,” Bob says. And that’s part of their secret to staying young and happy.

The other part of their secret is a happy marriage and a healthy family. And their advice for having a happy marriage? Don’t fight. “We’ve never had any real major disagreements,” Bob says. “Anything that we haven’t agreed on, we’ve been able to work out and not let anything build up.”

“We learned that when you have a little disagreement, it isn’t the end of the world,” Agnes agrees. “Instead we just try to be patient and solve the problem instead of rushing home to mother.”

“Our children probably contributed to it,” Bob says. “We never had a sleepless night worrying about the kids.” The Shipleys say having similar values helped them raise their family—including three children, six grandchildren and six great-grandchildren with a seventh on the way.

They also credit farm life for developing those values they installed in their children. “We think the farm is the best place to raise a family,” Bob says. “It gave the children something to do. They had livestock to take care of and two acres of tomatoes they took care of that helped with paying for college. It gave them good work experience and helped them to know where their food comes from.”

Agriculture and education has been very important to the Shipleys all their lives. Bob Shipley earned undergraduate degrees from Virgina Tech and a graduate degree from Ohio State University, and Agnes earned her degree from Madison College and became certified to teach elementary education through Appalachian State University. The Shipleys were both teachers until their retirement, and today both are still active in the community.

N.C. Cooperative Extension Service set up an endowment fund in the Shipleys’ name to support agricultural programs for youth in Watauga County.

In addition to Bob’s involvement with Watauga County Farm Bureau, he has also been a member of the Rotary Club for 60 years, Ruritan Club for 45 years and an active member of his church.

The church has held an important role in the Shipleys’ marriage. They credit their happy marriage and healthy family to their faith. And the church was also how they met. “A friend of mine said I know the nicest young man at church,” Agnes recalls. “I said, ‘I don’t see any young men!’ But when she introduced us, I thought he was a right nice fellow.”

The couple met in 1940 and dated for two years before getting married in 1942. “I just wanted to be sure,” Bob says. “I was 30 and she was 25, but we didn’t want to rush into marriage. You should have your mind pretty solidly made up.”